Amnesia Trap (GL) - Chapter 59

What Sheng Zhi hadn’t expected was that her simple act of taking the initiative to hold her hand would cause Ji Qingfan’s expression to become instantly joyous, even revealing an intensely clinging, affectionate quality.

Ji Qingfan gazed at her without blinking, her icy fingertips instantly becoming more proactive as they slid between Sheng Zhi’s fingers, interlacing them tightly.

“It really is cold, isn’t it?” Her voice slowed down.

She seemed to be trying hard to suppress another intense emotion, but she was so distracted she couldn’t control her tone, resulting in a slight, almost pathological tremor in her voice.

“Ji Qingfan?” Sheng Zhi noted her reaction, her voice rising in confusion.

…Why such a big reaction just from holding hands? Even if she were adding a layer of performance to deliberately express her happiness, this was playing it a bit too far.

Ji Qingfan tilted her head at the sound of her name. Her softened tone seemed coated in honeyed syrup as her eyes curved into crescents. “Hmm? Yes, I’m here.”

The look she gave Sheng Zhi still held that strange, concentrated joy. She gripped her hand even tighter.

The rain wasn’t particularly heavy and, quite fortunately, it stopped just as they arrived home. The scent of petrichor diffused through the air. The rain had arrived in a hurry and left just as quickly, as if merely to bring a fleeting mist to this warming season to prove it had been there.

Stepping back into this home—where Ji Qingfan claimed they had lived together for a long time—something had already begun to change silently. The lie about cohabitation that Ji Qingfan had told her before had now become a reality, an ongoing present tense.

Jiang Wanyin’s words, “It’s only been how long,” involuntarily echoed in Sheng Zhi’s ears.

It seemed that in this subconscious manner, the connection between her and Ji Qingfan was growing deeper and deeper. As for the second half of Jiang Wanyin’s sentence—”and you’ve already fallen for her”—she deliberately and selectively ignored it due to a hidden, instinctive resistance and unease.

However, thinking of Jiang Wanyin, Sheng Zhi decided to find another time to have an open and honest talk with her. After all, neither of them had controlled their emotions well, and the final scene had been very awkward. Given their relationship, if it were to end, it should end peacefully, serving as a respectful full stop to their years of friendship.

Sheng Zhi thought about it carefully; this hadn’t been entirely without warning. She should have noticed something was off earlier when Jiang Wanyin reacted so strongly to Ji Qingfan. She just hadn’t thought in that direction at all. After all, years ago when Jiang Wanyin learned she was to marry into the Yun family, she hadn’t shown any reaction.

Still, having a friendship of many years end this way—transforming from best friends into strangers—brought a surge of melancholy sadness. Perhaps some people could stay friends after a confession, continuing to laugh and joke as if nothing had happened, but Sheng Zhi couldn’t do that. Even if they remained “friends,” they could never interact as they once did. They couldn’t go back.

Moreover, the point she most wanted to clarify was that this wasn’t a matter of choosing one person over another. Jiang Wanyin had asked her to make a choice, but in reality, it had nothing to do with choice. She simply… did not have those romantic feelings for her. If she did, being so close, they would have been together long ago.

So even if Ji Qingfan didn’t exist, there would be someone else eventually. Since she didn’t like her, she couldn’t leave room for ambiguity or false hope, as that would only hurt her. Just as Jiang Wanyin said she became a racer because of her, Sheng Zhi hoped that once Jiang Wanyin let go of these feelings, she could go and embrace her own true passions.

Sheng Zhi was somewhat lost in thought. Ji Qingfan’s gaze swept over her face imperceptibly before she assumed a concerned posture, knowingly asking, “Jiao Jiao, is something bothering you?”

Hearing this, Sheng Zhi snapped out of her thoughts and instinctively touched her cheek.

…Was she being that obvious? Even Ji Qingfan noticed. She lowered her hand, neither confirming nor denying. “Why do you ask?”

“You look like you have a lot on your mind.” Ji Qingfan reached out and touched Sheng Zhi’s face, her sigh falling as softly as a feather. “You weren’t like this before you went to see your friend. Did something happen during your meeting?”

“Nothing happened.” Sheng Zhi tilted her face away, having no intention of letting Ji Qingfan know about the situation with Jiang Wanyin, so she glossed over it vaguely. “We just hung out and chatted like usual. Your intuition is wrong.”

The answer was perfunctory, but fortunately, Ji Qingfan didn’t seem to intend to press her further. She only gave a soft “Ah.” “Then, has Jiao Jiao had dinner yet?”

Sheng Zhi thought about the answer she had just given and replied, “No.” This wasn’t a lie; she really hadn’t eaten.

“Then I’ll cook something; we can eat together.” Ji Qingfan tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Is there anything Jiao Jiao wants to eat?”

Seeing her tuck her hair back, Sheng Zhi instinctively mimicked the movement. “Cooking at home? We could go out.” She wasn’t actually very hungry, likely because of the things weighing on her mind.

Ji Qingfan, however, gave a rare refusal. “Does Jiao Jiao not like my cooking anymore?”

Sheng Zhi paused at the question. “I just thought going out would be more convenient.” To be fair, Ji Qingfan’s cooking was as good as many professional chefs. Not only was it delicious, but it also suited her palate perfectly, making it very hard to say anything negative about it.

“As long as you don’t dislike it,” Ji Qingfan smiled at her, casually tying up her long hair. “You probably wouldn’t dislike it anyway; after all, you loved it very much before you lost your memory.”

Sheng Zhi ended up following Ji Qingfan into the kitchen. She watched Ji Qingfan open the refrigerator and thought about the messy potatoes she had cut last time, pursing her lips awkwardly. In this area, she was too unskilled… at least compared to Ji Qingfan. If she were to cook, it would be a total disaster.

Ji Qingfan stood before the open fridge, gave a brief look, and withdrew her gaze. “I forgot we haven’t been home for a few days.” Her eyes returned to Sheng Zhi, and she continued naturally, “Let’s go to the supermarket and buy some groceries.”

Sheng Zhi was startled. “Go to the supermarket… for groceries?”

This was clearly a very foreign concept to her, let alone doing it with Ji Qingfan. Detecting something in her tone and expression, a shallow smile blossomed in Ji Qingfan’s eyes. “Jiao Jiao, we’ve done more things together than you can imagine.”

She leaned in suddenly, her tone soft and nearly seductive. “Though you’ve forgotten, it doesn’t matter. We can do them over and over again until you remember.”

Their noses touched intimately. Her thick lashes lowered, her eyes brimming with an affection that could turn someone into a mess. There was no obvious intent to bewitch, yet it felt like a thousand threads of entanglement.

The atmosphere grew quiet with her words. It wasn’t a silent silence, but the kind that made the heart tingle and go numb, a soft sinking with no place to anchor, causing a groundless palpitation.

Sheng Zhi bit her lip and moved her gaze away with difficulty, no longer looking at Ji Qingfan.

“…Let’s go. To the supermarket.”

The driver took them to a high-end boutique supermarket. Ji Qingfan pushed the shopping cart, happily picking up several boxes of strawberries and cherries.

Sheng Zhi crossed her arms and watched her for a moment. Noticing that Ji Qingfan was only picking things she liked, she couldn’t help but say, “You don’t have to get only things I like.”

In response, Ji Qingfan just gave her a sweet smile and took her hand. “Jiao Jiao, let’s go over there and buy some vegetables.”

Under the bright indoor lights, from her perspective, Ji Qingfan’s eyes seemed tinted with a shimmering brightness. Together, they selected the ingredients for dinner. The cart gradually filled up.

At a corner, Sheng Zhi abruptly placed her hand on the black handle of the cart, intending to stop Ji Qingfan from pushing it further. Noticing her hand, Ji Qingfan thought Sheng Zhi had seen something she wanted to buy and stopped. “What is it, Jiao Jiao?”

But before Sheng Zhi could speak, a strange female voice suddenly cut in.

“Um… sorry to bother you. I apologize for taking the liberty, but this photo is just too perfect.”

Sheng Zhi and Ji Qingfan looked over simultaneously. They saw a girl holding a Polaroid camera, looking at them nervously. In her hand was a high-quality photo.

Given their striking appearances and auras, they had received many glances along the way, but being photographed was a surprise. Sheng Zhi raised an eyebrow and took the photo from the girl.

In the photo, she and Ji Qingfan were very close, their gazes meeting. The overhead lights blurred into the background of the various goods behind them, and the full shopping cart in front of them wove together a warm, gentle tone.

The girl who took the photo gave it to them, waved shyly, and left.

“It’s a beautiful shot.” Ji Qingfan clearly loved it, her fingertips carefully touching the photo. “Jiao Jiao, what do you think?”

Sheng Zhi stuffed the photo into Ji Qingfan’s hand and then took over the cart naturally. “It’s just a photo. If you like it, you keep it.” She spoke casually, but the image from the photo kept flashing in her mind. It really was beautiful and atmospheric.

However, seeing herself and Ji Qingfan through someone else’s eyes like this—they looked far more compatible and intimate than she imagined… for some reason, her chest felt strangely warm.

The checkout line wasn’t exactly short. While waiting, Sheng Zhi noticed Ji Qingfan was no longer looking at the photo but was staring in another direction, seemingly lost in thought. She instinctively followed Ji Qingfan’s gaze.

Several rows of different colored boxes of contraceptives (dactylotheca) instantly came into view. Sheng Zhi’s gaze froze.

So… Ji Qingfan is looking at these?

Upon realizing this, her cheeks flushed red. Her fingertips on the cart moved slightly. She waited a bit, but Ji Qingfan continued to stare intently.

How long is she going to look? The hint was a bit too blatant.

Sheng Zhi struggled for a second, then in one breath, she grabbed several boxes. The colorful packaging fell into the cart like a handful of Skittles.

“Stop looking, I got them.” She kept her voice very low, clutching the cart handle awkwardly as she spoke.

Hearing her, Ji Qingfan turned her gaze back, but her tone sounded like she didn’t quite understand. “Looking at what?”

“Stop pretending, you were clearly…” Noticing Ji Qingfan’s gaze move toward the cart as if searching for an answer, Sheng Zhi’s unfinished sentence came to a screeching halt.

Sheng Zhi: “…”

She realized things weren’t as she had thought, but it was too late to put them back. She had grabbed too many boxes, and putting them back would be much more of a hassle than taking them—they would need to be stacked neatly one by one.

In a split-second pause, she quickly reached out and forcefully shoved other items in the cart over the colorful boxes with a clatter, trying to make them disappear from sight. However, it only served as a futile, suspicious attempt at a cover-up.

Seeing this, Ji Qingfan blinked, her lips moving as if she wanted to say something.

Sheng Zhi’s face grew hotter. The tips of her ears were practically burning.

Fortunately, the person in front of them finished checking out. Sheng Zhi pushed the cart forward, her face crimson, and whispered a fierce command to Ji Qingfan: “Don’t you dare say a word.”